Why We Study Limits In Calculus


Good morning class, my name is Olive-Verse (rap god incarnate) and today I will be your substitute Calculus teacher.

Audience groans

Today we will be learning about limits, but before we learn about limits, we need to know why we study them. In order to do that, we have to tell the story of Zero.

This is the story of Zero.

Zero was born slightly different. He simply wasn’t like the other kids. He wasn’t like the good positive numbers, like number one, tall enough to grab a book from the top shelf without a stepladder. He wasn’t like 2, who’s graceful black hair fell down perfectly straight along her back. He couldn’t crack jokes like 3 or even snap his fingers like 4. He wasn’t as fast or strong as 5, nor as agile or flexible as 6. He couldn’t even understand some of the words 7 was already using, and 8 could do a headstand. 9 could do arithmetic faster than Zero could write down the problem.

The bus had ten seats and Zero would place his backpack on the seat beside him as soon as he sat down.

The cafeteria had triangular tables for 3 people each, and Zero would always have an entire table for himself.

When Zero wanted to play tag with everyone else, the game ended. Without him being tagged at all.

After a few weeks went by, Zero sat down, despondent, and cried. Not a sound was made.

Zero’s house aptly called “Property of Zero (Additive).” He was never recognized because when you add zero to another number you see Zero fade away, as if he never existed. He even wanted the mean negative numbers to notice him, but despite his additions to their conversations, it was like as if he never existed at all.

Finally, one night, in bed, Zero tried everything. He added zero to himself, multiplied zero to himself, subtracted zero to himself. Then when everything was finally over, he divided zero by himself. The mirrors around him that he checked all showed the worst had happened… Calculator error signs. He collapsed into his bed, hoping for it all to be over. It was over now, right?

Wrong.

When he woke up, sweat on his pillow, he frantically scanned himself in the mirror to see if he had changed. He hadn’t.

However, unbeknownst to him, when he was walking outside his house, the insignia was no longer a bronze cross, but rather a bronze X, and the nameplate read “Property of Zero. (Multiplicative)”

Along the way he bumps into 5, and now, instead of 5 simply pushing him away, upon contact, 5 collapses onto the ground, writhing in pain, until he himself turns into a zero. At first Zero watches this happen in terror, then a grin spreads across his face as wide as the minor axis that makes up his elliptical face. Today he would no longer be Zero.

On the bus, he grabs a hold of 7, creating another zero. The rest of the students shriek and panic and hide from zero. At school, Zero shows no mercy. He chases after everyone, finally able to have his turn to be “It.”

Finally, Zero approaches his last target. Eyes shining in bloodlust, Zero lashes out at Infinity. Infinity was a stellar student in every aspect. He was placed into the gifted and talented program, but constantly felt bored in class. No one could understand his ideas; even his teachers had trouble understanding even the language he used. Zero lashes out his crossed arms, but Infinity holds him back. Infinity pushes Zero to the ground, struggling to stop him, but during the struggle, the winner was Indeterminate. Infinity rose out, then called out to Zero “Will you ever stop this? I understand how you feel!” Zero called back “How could you ever understand how I feel, you’ve never been treated like nothing!”

“You don’t think I am treated like nothing? I’m the biggest number there is, leaps and bounds ahead of everyone. No one understands me at all. The teachers don’t know what to do with me and neither does anyone else.”

“Then why are we having this conversation?”

“Because perhaps maybe we have both felt the same thing for a long time. Maybe it’s time to stop this, Zero, and help the numbers understand us.”

So, Infinity helped rebuilt the other numbers.

When you study calculus, remember that you are studying the relationships between numbers. The idea that we can approach any number, even ones that are nothing or everything, and understand them: that is what a limit is.


Limit as x approaches infinity of 1 over x, 2 over x, 3 over x, 4 over x, and on... they all approach zero. The people who we never see, who silently and secretly support numbers like 10 and 100 and 1000, they must be appreciated and understood. They deserve that much for the work they do. That is why we study limits. Thank you for listening class. If I ever come back next time, I'll be teaching you about the rebellious student Derivative.

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